Sunday, January 10, 2010

Time Square

So today I walking through time square like I do everyday. Time Square, it's so wonderful it clears my head and shows me how truly lucky I am to be living in the greatest city in the world! Living in New York is like wining the lottery, it's just so damn beautiful here.

You see going to marymount, everybody thinks you're a snob but I'm not. I truly appreciate everything about life, especially since my dad died, he told me that everything in life is worth living all the pain and suffering just makes you really appreciate joy and happiness. He said " Living through pain makes you stronger and makes happiness better". I guess I know he means know.

When he died I thought the world had ended. He was my dad, there one minute gone that next. I was so depressed for at least 2 months, just sitting in my room, passing through every minute as if I weren't really there. I was completely out of it, just thinking of him all the time, everything he'd ever said to me, trying to think of all the times we were together, and then I thought about what he'd always said, about what it truly meant. Without pain there is no joy. That's it right there that's what he really meant. So I went outside and walked to time square it took a while but it was worth it, it really made me think. I had gone through something truly horrific and awful, I lost the most important man in my life. But, I couldn't just go home and mope I had to get out there and live my life. If not for me, but for him.

The pain I went through really does make happiness more happy it made me appreciate it more. I was finally out there enjoying myself appreciating life. So I started hanging out with my friends again and going out and actually start paying attention at school again. So I was living and because I was living I met the newest most important man in my life my beautifully understanding, caring boyfriend. So I'd like to thank the pain that brought me here to this place this place of pure happiness. That first day of going to time square, because of that day, of starting to live again, I now go to time square everyday. And that's what time square made me think about today about that time and how I truly learned to appreciate it.

I love you daddy!

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